Monday, July 21, 2014

What's the Best Caregiving Emotion?



This week, Denise Brown, founder of Caregiving.com  posed this question on her site to caregivers everywhere:

What's the best caregiving emotion?


That's a big question. For me the answer can change from hour to hour on any given day:

~Sometimes it's just the pure joy of knowing my life is dedicated to something so crucial as helping another person live another day.

~At other times, I feel the pride of being part of helping my son conquer a trial or reach a new goal.

~I feel compassion for the hurting, the satisfaction of a job well done, appreciation for a respite day.

~I am deeply grateful for all God has done for us.

Today, though, I want to celebrate loyalty.


You may think of loyalty as a personality trait, not an emotion. And it is an admirable characteristic of human nature. But it's so much more. The feeling of loyalty is what keeps a caregiver getting up and caring for a loved one--day after day, year after year.

That dedication to someone who needs us is a powerful motivator. It pushes us beyond our normal limits, past the usual boundaries to give sacrificially, completely, without reserve.

It intertwines us with our loved one like two trees that grow together, until it is impossible to uproot one without breaking the other. Both are strengthened and stabilized in its grip.

If loyalty were a color, it would be blue, as vast as the sky above and as powerful as an ocean tide, pulling us ever upward and onward.

Beyond the pain. Above the discouragements. Into a place of peace.  

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers: Part 2


  • "I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." {Psalm 121:1-2}
  • "Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long." {Psalm 25:4-5}
  • "Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." {Psalm 23:6}
  • "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." {Philippians 4:6}
  • "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength."
    {Philippians 4:13}

    Part 1 of 20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers
    Part 3 of 20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers
    Part 4 of 20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers

Thursday, July 10, 2014

20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers: Part 1


  • "I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety." {Psalm 4:8}

  • "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." {Proverbs 3:5-6}
  • "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." {Jeremiah 29:11}
  • "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." {Matthew 6:34}
  • "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows." {Matthew 10:29-31}

    Part 2 of 20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers
    Part 3 of 20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers
    Part 4 of 20 Encouraging Bible Verses For Caregivers

Thursday, June 12, 2014

16 Things To Do For A Weary Caregiver

According to The National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP, there are roughly 44.4 million caregivers in America. Odds are, you either know someone who is a caregiver, you’re caring for a family member yourself, or you will care for your parents someday in the future. Caregivers are selfless individuals, who either work alone at home or depend on family members for support. Caring for another person isn’t easy – it’s a full-time occupation. These men and women are strong, devoted, and loyal members of society.

Working singularly is the norm for most caregivers, because they prefer to tackle the situation on their own. This is understandable, as they would know best on how to care for a disabled or elderly family member. However, living as a caregiver can grow into a lonely task. Most friends or neighbors either don’t understand a caregiver’s situation or are uncomfortable on how to approach them. Caregivers don’t have to feel isolated. You can help.

Caregivers are independent and often forget to take care of themselves. They may appear to brush off help, but inwardly, they need it. Everyone appreciates a little assistance here and there. They may shy away from too much attention, but encouragement and support for their occupation is greatly appreciated. Your kindness won’t go unnoticed, and you may be the refreshing break that they need from their crazy routine.

*Note* This does not apply to every caregiver.

1. Send he/she an encouraging note card that says “I was thinking of you.”

2. Offer to make them a meal for lunch or dinner and drop it off at their residence. Or if they’d prefer, provide them with food from a restaurant.

3. Keep them in your prayers.

4. If they have kids, offer to take them on a fun outing for the day. Kids in a caregiver’s home will love the attention, and the parent/parents will relish the rest.

5. Buy them a cookbook for quick and easy recipes. Caregivers are limited on time, and this would make a great gift for their daily meals.


6. Set up an event party at their home for a game or movie night.

7. Call ahead to see if you could stop by for a brief visit. Lend an ear and listen to their story.

8. Offer to swing by and be Cinderella for the day. Make dinner, wash dishes, sweep and vacuum the floor, mow the lawn, walk the dog, clean the cat litter box, and empty the garbage.

9. Gift a journal, a candle, and a devotional to the family.

10. Surprise them with a gift in the mail. A bouquet of flowers. A coffee mug and a gift card to a coffee shop. Pamper them with a basket of bath and body products.


11. Give them a hug and a smile. Let them know through your actions that you’re there for encouragement.

12. Invite them to a support group, book club, or a Bible study. Caregivers are busy and they will be grateful for the invitation. Because of their schedule, they may decline it. This, of course, depends entirely on the caregiver’s position.

13. Offer to pick up their groceries and run misc. errands.

14. Plan a birthday party at their home. Holidays are hectic. Imagine how much more hectic it is for caregivers. Ask how you can best help them during the holidays. String lights, set up a Christmas tree, bake cookies. Put together a wonderful birthday celebration for their kids.

15. Do they need a wheelchair, walker, or even a heated blanket? With their permission, start a fund for raising money to supply the needed item.

16. Share with them these helpful websites: caregiving.com, caregiver.com, caregiversupport.org, christiancaregiversupport.com, restministries.com,

Most of all, weary caregivers need your love. Be there for a caregiver, and they won’t feel alone.

Monday, May 19, 2014

What Is an "Informal Caregiver"?

Until I read Howard Gleckman's great post entitled "Informal Caregiving? Free Caregiving? Seriously?" on http://www.forbes.com, I had never heard of the term "informal caregiver." In fact, since my first baptism into caregiving with my invalid mother years ago, I have had a healthy respect for the job. In my seventeen years of caring for a disabled son, I would never have put the word caregiving together with a word as colorless as "informal."

Informal is what you wear to work on Fridays. It's sneakers and dirty jeans and hamburgers.

Informal is for when you don't care enough to give your very best.

The caregivers I know are anything but colorless. They are people capable of great devotion. Their daily lives include sacrifices that would make lesser beings tremble. They have dark days, to be sure, but the intensity of their sense of purpose and dedication can light up the room.

They feel deeply and love well. They also fall and doubt. Life for them is a roller coaster of thrills and chills.

Good, bad, and ugly, yes. But informal? Not hardly.