What's the first thing to do when you don't know the first thing about home education?

Listen for God's voice

You will need His guidance every day. When everyone around you is shouting, His is the voice you can trust. Practice what you want your children to learn, starting with listening to your Father. Ask His advice, read His revealed Word in the Scriptures, and follow His lead.

Set your goals

All I knew in the beginning was that I wanted our children to love Jesus first. My second goal was to give them the best education we could manage. I wanted them to learn critical thinking (the process of objectively analyzing and processing information to guide our beliefs and actions) and become contributing members of society.

Particularly if a child is older and been in a different schooling atmosphere, a parent may have to deal with some serious attitude problems. It will likely also bring to the surface any relationship issues already present in the family.

An honest parent will admit to some disturbing attitudes of his/her own to battle. Those will emerge in the heat of the day. Especially at first, a parent may spend most each day working through personality conflicts.

If this happens to you, don't despair. This is exactly what you should be doing. Learning and teaching healthy interpersonal interactions and conflict resolution are some of the most important work we will ever do.

Forget the math quiz. In its proper role, rote learning is important, but secondary, to character-building. If you have to spend a whole morning working through a bout of sibling rivalry or teaching your children they can't manipulate you, the time is well-spent.

It will help if the child learns from the start that you won't allow study time to become a power struggle. The grown-up should be the grown-up in the room. Exert gentle but firm authority. The child has to learn to complete a task, even a distasteful one. This is the only way he will develop respect for others and the patience the real world demands. Just make sure the task isn't so far beyond his abilities that he becomes frustrated.

You will probably need to adjust your teaching goals many times along the way. Some children are ready at an earlier age for more intense study than others. The wise parent will back away from pushing him too hard and resort to more informal activities until the child is ready. With practice, you will learn the difference between a child who is a complainer and one who is truly struggling.

Do your research

There were precious few resources or curricula for us in 1982. Because I had no experience in education and needed to build a solid track record with documentation in case we received a legal challenge to our homeschool, I chose a very strict program. As home education became a legal alternative in our state and the years wore on, I stayed close to that system but relaxed our schedules.

Today there are so many ways to homeschool and such a bewildering mountain of advice and curricula, you will probably feel overwhelmed. Don't stress over picking the perfect plan. This is your school! Choose a curriculum that fits your family's style and your own goals. You will likely change things up many times along the way, anyhow.

I'm glad we taught our children to work hard, but now I truly wished we'd played more and worried less about getting everything right. I unwittingly transferred some of my own worry to them and gave them more pressure at times than they should have had. When you're slashing through the jungles of new territory, be wary of inflicting your own unintentional, incidental injuries.

Understand the battle

Speaking of battles, there will be many. When you have declared war on hell, expect resistance. It will come from all sides. Let this be your assurance you are on the right track. Remember gates only serve to keep something in or out. They do not have wings or wheels and can't advance to take new territory. They only stand or fall.

If someone you love is trapped, storm the gates. Start with prayer, walk carefully, and stay close to God. He will guide your steps.

...upon this rock I will build My church; and the gates of Hades will not overpower it.

- Matthew 16:18

Commit to the long haul

Early homeschool advocates Dr. Raymond and Dorothy Moore once noted that homeschooling is not for the fainthearted. That, my friend, is an understatement. It is a demanding job testing a parent's strength and patience to the very limits. Probably beyond.

All commitments succeed through determination and are independent of our feelings. Most married couples lose that initial first electrical attraction as their love moves to a more mature stage. Successful marriages are built upon the work and devotion to keep their relationship vital and alive. That same hard work is necessary to develop our relationships with our children and train them for godliness.

Prisms Caregiving: Inspirations and Resources

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Monday, September 11, 2023

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